Please do not expect me.....

                                                                           

My eyes are blurry as the waves of tears are flooding them. My heart is bleeding and my soul is crying. The deafening shrieks of my Jewish essence refuse to fade.

I watch the falling victims of evil all around me. They are white, black, yellow. They are Christians, Muslims, Hindus. They are gay, they are straight. They are religious and they are atheists. They are young and they are old. Evil sees no color, no creed and no age. It smites anything and anyone who stands in its way towards its own redemption towards the fulfillments of its revolting prophecies.

The four chambers of my Jewish heart, however, have room to mourn and hurt the pain, the loss of only my people. Why? Because, as I repeated time and again, if I don’t, very few others, if any, will.

I am not going to beg you, plead with you, dear world, to join me on the journey of my bereavement. You never did, you never will. If anything, you only helped and continue to help pave the way and remove the roadblocks that hamper the path for those who target us, those who wish to turn us into an extinct specimen in the history of mankind.

Please do not expect me to join you when you mourn and count your dead strewn on the very same trail that you have toiled so hard to devise for us. I cannot, I simply cannot. I am still mourning millions of my people who died in the fires of the altars of history, alters that you and your ancestors sweated so hard to erect in their efforts to purge this world of a plague called “Jews.”

The tears I shed help extinguish those fires. Unfortunately, you never tire to ensure there are more fires than the gashes which my drying eyes could ever yield.

So please, do not expect me to join you in your pain. The scars of my ache reject, much with your unrelenting support, the healing process of my own agony. I have no time, no ability to share yours. You have numbed my sensitivity to your suffering. The bitter taste of the medicine you have been feeding my people has intoxicated us. It has failed you.  We have become indifferent to it. Unfortunately, it has made us like you, oblivious.

Your antics have forced many of us to produce our own medicine. We even have a name for it, “Our Jewish people come first!” We care for Jews first. If our common enemy, the monster you have given birth to, fed and nurtured, leaves our Jewish victims next to yours, we will mourn ours first. We will remember and commemorate ours before we do yours.

Please do not expect us to do otherwise.